Take Interest, Take Notice, Take ME with you.

So I was reading that book "He's just not that into you" and I really didn't help me out but it made me think of a few things:

1. If a guy you like spontaneously starts wanting to be with you and starts calling you everyday do to stuff, that means he has some interest in you??? Right. WRONG. He's using you because when he spontaneously stops talking to you and doesn't want to hang around you, it means he just not that into you. Or he just decided to get back together with his Ex. or whatever
2. If you meet a really cute, funny guy at a party and you hit it off but forget to get his number or the other way around, DO NOT go looking for him on facebook or stalk him or try to get his number from mutual friends. Chances are that you guys DID hit it off, so If you can find him on facebook, he can find you. It makes it more of a chase if he initiates it first. If he doesn't he is LAZY and you don't want to be with a LAZY guy. Even if say you did find him and you hit it off instantly or later, you will still be the one who made the first move and that could be how the relationship is......
3. If you like this kid who is cute and genuinely a nice guy but you only hang out with him at night[2am or later] Do Not let that part of him phase you. Just because you may talk to him and see him on a regular basis, doesn't mean it will turn into something more. The reason you hang out that later is because he doesn't want anything more. He's just not that into you. Be with someone who thinks about you everyday and every minute, not just for some fun times at night. Girls deserve so much better and they shouldn't think they are not relationship worthy. Every girl CAN get any guy they want. They just have to first believe they can and respect themselves.
4. If a guy makes you choose over another guy, Please remember what you like about him and what you don't. It's horrible to make a quick decision without thinking it through. Be careful I would say follow your brain and let it do all the thinking but when it comes to it, You have to be in tune and listen to you heart[wow that sounds so corny but its true]. Your brain thinks about the logical parts or a relationship but its like the church, you have to have faith that's what makes you grow stronger. If you think way too hard about things like The Book Of Mormon and the stories, you'll mind will take over and it will lead you away from the spirit and you will be confused on whats really true. So back to relationships, It is simple as just following that little gut feeling,:) don't think about the all the little logistics. ok now I'm rambling I'll stop.
   
5. Be careful which bridges you wish to rebuild. keep your guard up, just because its the past doesn't mean it can't effect the future.
6. This is really isn't advice but this one just bugs me: So you like this kid but your not sure when the right time kiss is. if he tries to kiss you and you accept it, does that make you easy? Does it give him the right to disrespect you? lets say option b where you say" I think we are taking things to fast". The boy would back off and later say he has respect for you for turning him down.......... so back to option a where you let him kiss you. Why should the girl have to be the ones to turn down the guy, why can't he just not make the move in the first place. I mean doesn't that make more sense if he likes a girl he should respect her instead of testing her limits? I understand the whole getting to know you stage and all [that is very important] BUT if all is said then why can't it be done too.
   

Photo 360, originally uploaded by rachbobach453.

shoes. I'm not really a shoe person but I sure do love these. red. white and blue and crocodiles. my favorite things.

This weather here in Utah is killing me. I'm getting depressed and I'm hating where I am right now. I need new friends, a job, new teeth, and new hair. Hopefully I will have checked them all off by the end of April. What I'm hating most is where I am living. I hate going into my apartment and hating being there. There are only about three people in there that don't piss me off constantly. You would think its just that time of the month that I'm just really irritable and a bee but I'm like that all the time now. I really dont mean to but I think I'm just stuck in a Hell Hole that its just normal for me to be like this. You know there are some voices that are like screeching birds and you want to strangle them that sounds like that. Those people are around me a lot . Do I have a sign that says "annoy Rachel or Michele or whatever her name is." I really shouldn't be rude over the internet because like mom says "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.".....I do have other great friends new and old, but I guess now that I'm getting older, It's getting harder to tell which ones are my true friends. I hate that. Hate it.

These are the things that seperate you fom being a mature adult and making mistakes, what makes the difference is when you decide its important to change and if you care about yourself enough to actually do it... My roommate/my best friend shared that with me today. 

My life really isn't that hard, I just have a lot of upsets in life. Most people have learned to get over then or what makes them feel better from it, but for some reason I missed that lesson in primary or something. I have no idea how to calm myself from my anger or little upsets, as I may call them. I try Yoga, listening to music while hanging off my bed, screaming really loud.... nothing seems to feel that void of peace and calm feelings. Syd was giving me all this advice and help and I know all of it is true and seems very logical, I just don't know how to apply it and use it. Its not like math how when you learn an equation and a light bulb flickers and you just get it, Its like ferbies, They are so absurd and dumb but once you learn to shut it up....no never mind you still have no idea why ferbies exist. Another thing that really upsets me, is how some people can be so dumb that they don't even realize it....EVER. For example, a guy that you maybe, just maybe like, talks about other girls to you just so causally that its so dumb. They may not even realize their offense, but shouldn't they have the decency to get a hint that if the girl is making any kind of effort to talk to you, invite you to do things that they MAY like YOU. I am usually not the one to talk about this so openly but Its really bugging me a lot. To the point that I am giving up. So I'm done with them.

Let me Repeat this LOUDLY: I don't need anymore boys that are friends. Reaally i don't. I have the perfect amount already. So what are you waiting for?

Okay so I've realized I really am the queen of procrastination. I win every time. It should make me upset but i doesn't I guess I've learned that thats who I am I can't try to be this Girl that always on top of things because thats just not my style I guess. Haha, wow I'm so waiting for syd to say Thats what she said any moment now. It was funny Chris came over last night, well at 1 am and we just talked about the dumbs in life, and we were talking about all the BEST "thats what she said" jokes. oh so funny so funny.

=

So I'm sitting in the library with Whitney trying to write some paper about hurricane Ike and I see this kid putting his leg on top of the girls shoulder. freak, then I'm at kneaders[best panini's and soup ever] and these folks were of some race, talking really LOUD in their language. To add on he was groping her and she giggled and I was eating and almost threw up a little in my mouth. whats up with the Display of affection. We get it, you have S.E.X... You don't need to express that to everyone in the world.

Anyway. I'm really bored at the Library. and the more I look around I wonder, "what the hell" about everything. Like who wears shorts, long sleeves and UGGS? its Freaking winter. Or. Why do people that by putting flowers everywhere makes the atmosphere better. Did they ever stop to think that some people hate flowers or they are deathly allergic to them or that some people hate the color red? Or. Shouldn't people say "Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas.[To be politically correct] Not everyone celebrates Christmas. I'm not sure why who wouldn't though because I love Christmas trees and Egg nog and candy canes and ugly sweaters with Santa and reindeer and Old Navy commericals. Who doesn't. My neighbors in Round rock are Jewish and even though I find there decorations strangely odd. I LOVE IT. They painted their door Bright Blue<> then they make a menorah with bright green pool noodles and they wrap lights around it and light one each night. They even painted their Neighborhood reindeer Bright Blue. Amazing. I love that in a world set on something like Christmas, they can still be them. I'm not saying I want to become Jewish though. I like sunbeams too much.

I VOTED! It was stressful but I did it. And even though I live in Utah and the state is pretty much all republican, I'm still glad I voted. I did my part. I'm American.


So a funny thing happened monday night at FHE. First off, I was not excited to go because I didn't really know anyone in my group except my roommates, but I went anyway. So we played this game were you just pretty much introduce yourself and say something unique about yourself. I, like always say that I'm adopted and my new roommate whose name is Rachel gasped "Me too!!!" so she asked where and I said "louisiana" and she gasped again and said" ME TOO!!!!!!" and you can kind of guess what happens next. Turns out we both we born in Baton Rouge!!!! insane right. Two girls named Rachel both adopted from the same city living together! We both went crazy. Laughing and crying at the same time. I loved it. After FHE we immedietly called our moms to tell the news. I'm glad I finally feel like I've found my place here in Provo.
I love my roommates.

I hate that feeling that you can't do anything about your life. like its on pause and nothing good/or bad is happening. For the past 3 days I've felt like that. Being sick makes you want to enjoy things longer and more often because in that moment of being sick you cant do anything but feel sorry for yourself. When you're sick everyone talks to you in a baby voice like that when you're sick you turn into some baby, because as said before you cant do anything for yourself. The only good thing about being sick is that you can be super lazy and wear the clothes you wore yesterday and no one is going to nag on you. They understand. When your sick you hallucinate. For instance, last night i watched every cw show that I've missed for the past 3 weeks [so I'm happy to say- IM ALL CAUGHT UP!!!!] So anyway I watched at least 5 hours of Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill and 90210 and I kept looking at the clock and it would always show 1:12 then 3 hours later it was 12:12, I freaked out. How was that possible huh?! Yeah crazy. So another thing you do when you're sick. make lists. like what I want to accomplish this week or year
THINGS I WANT TO DO THIS WEEK.

• Go to every single class this week
• Don't be afraid of rejection or acceptance
• Smile more
• Call the parentals more and tell them "I love y'all"
• Laugh over the silly unimportant things
• Remember who I am when I walk out the door
• Think of others in my doings
• Stop being a paranoia freak
• Think before asking questions or making comments
• Love the skin I'm in

So a lot has happened since ACC classes ended. I wake up at 12 am everyday. Its a bittersweet relationship I have with my bed; I love sleeping in it, but when Im there too long I end up feeling like a waste in Rachel world.  Note to self: get up at 10 everyday, and NOT go to bed after 4 am. Lets see, the 4th of July was a blast. Fun with the family, friends and Carla. I love that girl, I wish I could be more carefree like her. Next week was the 12 hours that never happened. There's pretty much nothing else to say other than, we left Austin at 8 p.m and left San Antonio at 8 a.m the next morning. Hm. There was this singles dance that was somewhat fun. Actually it really wasn't, we just had to make it fun, which is why i love how my friends are. They don't get grumpy when something ends up lame, they change it and make it fun. Last week, Bronwen, Kyria and I played Rockband for 6 hours straight. Yeah. Then everyday after it became the norm: Work, eat, come to Rachel's and play Rockband. That was probably one of the fun-est weeks  of this summer so far. This week is going by super slow. Maybe its because the hours I stay up late at night add on to the hours of the next day. Or maybe its because all i can think about it Utah. Im so ready to be at my "home" away from home. 

Summer school I thought would be so easy. boy was I wrong. Acc has taken over my life, literally, i wake up at 8:30 which to others may seem like a reasonable time, but for me its still way to early. at least for summer for a 19 year old, come on!! so i have english for 1 hour an a half not bad then MATH from 1:10 till 3:45 its killer and the worst part is is that its not hard stuff, its actually quite easy, its just really time consuming, with the stupid linear equations and sucky polynomials or trinomials or whatever. and to add to the boring-ness of the class the teacher has an accent. there is not at all wrong with accents but anyone who has taken a class from a professor with an accent knows that it can be hard to focus when they say three and it sounds like tree. "what do trees have to do with math" is what i end up thinking instead of "what the heck is y=mx+b?". Other than school my social life has hit a very low peak, meaning i have no social life. yes i do have the occasional poker nights at elysemo's or the boys at 1031, or flight of the concord viewing with ely/tmi or aubster, but other weirdly i like it. I went to see dont mess with Zohan with my dad [which by the way was HORRIBLE] and it was fun and it was a friday. I began to remember those times when i was mortified to been seen with the parentals,[especially on a weekend] but now i dont mind it at all. maybe its just a stage every kid goes through??? back to the whole liking not being a social butterfly, i guess i needed to put that on pause, so i could do the important things and not miss out by partying. hmmm

So a lot has happened since march 21 2008. Kiks came and her birthday was a success it was fun getting to see her even though i saw her a week before in Texas! we had a birthday dinner and all the kids celebrated Easter Sunday together. The next week Happy Valley, every year has this Holi festival called the Festival of colors. You throw veggie color dye in the air and pretty much party. It was a blast! The next week was conference weekend and Whitney and i got tickets from the Bishop for Saturday session! It was Whitney and I's first time. So it was amazing. The Friday before i wore a Hanna Montana wig from Bed, Bath and beyond to a party. Its something to consider trying. Its almost like being someone else for a night! Another thing to consider: spending your days in the BYU library. whats best is to squirt purell into the palms of your hands when ever you see a purell dispenser.The fun part is that on the 3rd floor there is no purell in the purell dispenser so when the purell " comes out" pretend to  "eat" it, people will stare at you strange. Its a blast. That same weekend Whitney and i got into a fight. it was little but very significant. It started out with her telling me I wasn't accepting here because of her use of language and choice of clothing. she said "even though I'm Mormon now i still am going to dress and talk the way i want to because that's what makes me.. me". To her i guess that made sense for the way she was acting, but tell me if I'm wrong, but do the clothes you were and the choice of word make you who you are? It just wasn't making sense so we talked and talked and long story short: we aren't living together in the fall like planned, and i lost a really close friend. Yes we still talk and share past memories, but the close bond was gone. For good? well i don't know. its funny because whenever things didn't happen  way it was suppose to, both of us would say, "its for the best, things happen for a reason"

so today is the first post of my new blog i thought id give it a try. Also its my best friends birthday!! 18 and she came down to Utah for it so rmj.kmd.emd. are going to party!!! That picture I made last year for her and I entered it in a contest and won plus if you click HERE  rate it I can win stuff. so please VOTE. So heres a half update on my life in Utah so far.... I went to Uvsc in the fall and it was great. I made a huge mistake by taking an 8:00 class! Haha but it was still fun. I have had quite the apartment experience. First I lived with a girl whose boyfriend was over there constantly and him spending the night EVERY night. So i got out the first chance I got. The new apartment was ALOT  bigger and I payed the same. Weird. Then its suppose to be 5 girls in the apartments and as of now its just me and Jenna. Boring. She hasnt gotten the concept of living on her own and taking care of herself, meaning, shes a mess and doesn't pick up after herself. tell me if im wrong but when you move out of your parents house, dont you learn how to live on your own or do some people have everything done for them. haha. The boys around here are the same. They either want to get married or just play around. so with that said, I've had no luck. I met this girl Whitney in the elevator and from that night on were became bestfriends. Since Kyria is in other state i need someone help me out. I love her to death. I recently just took her to Texas and of course, as expected she LOVED it lol. Who wouldn't. well i gotta go get my hair done. Im going to try my hardest to keep this thing updated. <3>